Brutal.
Each day I'll hand you a scrap of paper.
It'll tell you what happened to you that day.
You felt a lump in your breast.
You looked at your wife and saw a stranger, et cetera.
Caden?
What?
When are we gonna get an audience in here?
It's been 17 years.
All right, I'm not excusing myself from this either.
I will have someone play me
to delve into the murky,
cowardly depths
of my lonely,
fucked-up being.
And he'll get notes too,
and those notes will correspond
to the notes I truly receive
every day from my god!
Get to work!
[#]
They fired me.
I caused an outbreak of conjunctivitis.
CADEN: Oh, God.
I didn't wash my hands.
I had pinkeye hands.
Oh, God. I'm such a stupid cow.
Fucking private Christian school is killing us.
You know, it's not cheap.
It's Derek's thing.
I don't believe in that shit, you know.
You try to be a good person.
I mean, that's all there is.
Do you have anything for me, Caden?
Uh...
I mean, I already have an assistant.
You know, I don't have a box office yet, but--
Please, Caden.
Please, Caden. I...
Please, Caden.
Sammy Barnathan?
This is Sammy Barnathan.
I don't have a résumé
or a picture.
I've never worked as an actor.
Good.
Tell me why you're here.
Well, I've been...
I've been following you for 20 years.
So I knew about this audition because I follow you.
And I've learned everything about you
by following you.
So hire me,
and you'll see who you truly are.
Peek-a-boo.
Okay.
Hazel, I don't think we need to talk to anyone else.
This guy has me down.
I'm gonna cast him right now.
And then maybe you and I can get a drink.
And we can try to figure out this thing between us...
why I cried.
'Cause I've never felt about anybody
the way I feel about you.
And I wanna fuck you
until we merge into a chimera,
a mythical beast
with penis and vagina eternally fused,
two pairs of eyes
that look only at each other,
and lips ever touching.
And only one voice
that whispers to itself.
Okay.
You've got the part.
[TOILET FLUSHES]
I've never seen your shit gray.
It's new.
That's a good-- Good boy.
[HUFFS]
[SIREN WHOOPS]
When is it opening?
When it's ready.
We need to get in. It's bad out here.
Sorry.
[CLEARS THROAT]
You know, I was thinking of calling it Simulacrum.
I-I-I don't even know what it means.
Can I have a nickel
if I doesn't play with my pee-pee no more?
Yeah.
How about The Flawed Light of Love and Grief?
I'm not sure.
Claire, I want you to play yourself.
Sammy's gonna move into your apartment set as me.
It, uh...
It would be my honor to play your husband, Claire.
You're an amazing actress.
No, I saw you do Bernarda Alba
last year at the Roundabout.
Yeah?
That was a fun play.
Emotionally, it was tough,
but fucking fulfilling.
Plus, I loved working with so many strong female actresses.
[LAUGHS]
I'm gonna start thinking about myself.
Start, huh?
[BOTH LAUGH]
Claire Keen. Claire Keen.
Why did we leave Adele, Caden?
She left us.
Now, you know that better than anybody.
Except me.
An amazing artist though.
The best living artist.
I mean, there's no one who stares the truth in the face
like she does.
Sweet pussy too.
How do you know that?
Oh, I read it.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
Anyway...
I mean, I don't know where she is.
[DRONE SOUND]
SAMMY: Well, maybe she's got
a sublet in New York.
Maybe she's got a retrospective at the Met.
Maybe...
baby.
CADEN: Why are you giving me this?
SAMMY: I wanna follow you there
and see how you lose even more of yourself.
Research.
You know, for the part.
Partner.
[#]
[BUZZES]
[BEEPS, DOOR OPENS]
[DINGS]
MAN: Hold it. Hold it, please.
Hold it, please.
I asked you to hold the door.
I'm sorry, I, uh, pressed the button,
but I think it was too late. You didn't press it.
Have a good night.
Yeah, thanks.
WOMAN: Are you Ellen?
What? - Ellen.
Are you Ellen Bascomb?
What?
I'm to give the key to 31Y to Ellen Bascomb.
Yes, I'm Ellen.
She said you should just go ahead and get started.
And don't forget to change the sheets.
Okay, thanks.
Oh, sweetheart.
CADEN: Adele?
ADELE: Hi, Ellen.
Be a doll and do the sheets
and whatever's in the hamper.
[COUGHS]
Your money's under the toaster.
Kisses. Mwah, Adele.
P.S. Bag of stuff in bedroom closet for Goodwill.
Take what you want.
CADEN: Went for a walk.
I had to think.
All night?
You smell weird.
Are you wearing lipstick?
No.
What do I--? What do I smell like?
Like bad? Like an old person?
I don't know. Like mold and cleaning products.
Like you're menstruating. I don't know.
Menstruating?
You tell me.
I-I don't menstruate.
So I don't know how I could smell like I'm menstruating.
I wouldn't know.
I don't like the guy you got to play you.
You don't like Sammy?
Why? I-I think he's good.
I think you should fire him.
Fuck you. I'm 45 years old.
I don't wanna do this shit anymore.
I won't fire him, he's the best thing in the play except you.
He's coming on to me.
He's grabbing my ass in rehearsal.
He's your husband. [POUNDING AND YELLING]
Good, Jimmy. He's not my goddamn husband.
You are. What the fuck is wrong with you?
I'm going to rehearsal.
It's about the play. We're getting at something real here.
That's great, you guys.
Beautiful, Sammy.
Caden? Time-out? - Yeah.
What's up?
Well, I feel we need a, uh-- A Hazel in here.
I mean, there's a whole side of Caden
I can't explore without a Hazel.
I guess, yeah.
HAZEL: I get to be a character?
Yeah.
Hurray.
ADELE: Hi, Ellen.
Crackerjack job last night.
[COUGHS]
Would you do sheets again?
We had quite a fuck,
and it's musky and gross.
Kisses, A.
CAMDEN: Hi, Adele.
Relined the cabinets.
I just wanted to let you know I won a MacArthur Grant.
And I'm mounting a play
which I think is gonna be pure and truthful.
Best, Ellen.
I went for a walk.
I had to think.
Caden, what are you doing at night?
I have a right to fucking know.
I've been going to Adele's place.
And cleaning it.
Do you have any idea what I've given up for you?
For this? For you? [KNOCKING]
For you? Could you please get that?
[KNOCKING CONTINUES]
Uh-oh, this looks serious. Am I interrupting?
What's going on, Hazel?
I just wanted you to know that the actress playing me
is ready to start today.
That's great,
that's all we need around here; two Hazels.
Okay, I'll take that as my cue.
Maybe you could clean her toilet.
Maybe I will.
This is over.
No, Claire--
I'm not talking to you.
I didn't say I was gonna clean Hazel's toilet.
He did. But you thought it!
I thought it, but I didn't say it.
I got an offer to do Needleman in a Haystack.
And I'm gonna take it.
I want you out of the apartment.
The real one. You can keep this one.
Claire.
Jesus.
Claire.
[DIALING]
Hi, yeah, we're gonna need a Claire replacement.
Claire!
I didn't say it!
I already put out a call
for a Claire replacement.
But I'm afraid I'm gonna have to move on.
Just like that?
You don't give a guy even a chance?
I'm not a chance-giving girl.
I'm a fun-loving girl, remember?
I try and be fun-loving, see?
Ha-ha-ha! Sorry.
My analyst says you have complexes.
Once you enjoyed Needleman's complexes.
That's before my analyst taught me--
This is the last of my stuff.
Bye. - Bye.
From the top?
Oh, Needleman, you had such potential.
But I'm afraid I'm gonna have to move on.
[CLAIRE LAUGHING]
I'm sorry. Okay.
Oh, Needleman, you had such potential.
But I'm afraid--
[LAUGHING]: I'm going to have to move on.
NEEDLEMAN: Just like that? Don't give a guy a chance?
CLAIRE: I'm not a chance-giving girl.
I'm a fun-loving girl.
NEEDLEMAN: Once you enjoyed Needleman's complexes.
CLAIRE: That's before my analyst taught me--
This is a lie.
NEEDLEMAN: Come here. I try to be fun-loving, see?
CLAIRE: She told me your hatred of--
Will.
Wall it up.
All of it.
Claire.
[CLAIRE GROANS]
[BEEPING]
CLAIRE: Oh, Needleman, oh...
[LAUGHS]
All right.
[DINGS]
ADELE [COUGHING]: Good for you with your grant.
Listen, I fixed up the walk-in as a sort of bedroom
if you want. We'd love to have you
and you wouldn't have to schlep all the way to Queens.
[CONTINUES COUGHING]
It's just a thought. Kisses, A.
OLIVE [AS ADULT]: Dear diary,
I'm afraid I'm gravely ill.
It is perhaps times like these
that one reflects on things past.
An article of clothing
from when I was young.
A green jacket.
A walk with my father.
A game we once played.
Pretend we're fairies. - Pretend we're fairies.
I'm a girl fairy. - I'm a girl fairy,
and my name is Lauralee, and my name is Lauralee.
and you're a boy fairy, and your name is Teetery.
Pretend when we're fairies, we fight each other.
And I say, "Stop hitting me or I'll die."
And you hit me again, and I say:
"Now I have to die."
And you say, "But I'll miss you."
And I say, "But I have to. But I have to.
"And you'll have to wait
"a million years to see me again.
"And I'll be put in a box
"and all I'll need is a tiny glass of water
"and lots of tiny pieces of pizza.
And the box will have wings like an airplane."
And you ask,
"Where will it take you?"
"Home," I say. - Home.
This is to hear.
So words-- English here, yeah?
[SPEAKING GERMAN] TRANSLATOR: I'm dying
as I'm sure Maria told you.
The flower tattoos have become
infected and they're dying.
So I am as well.
This is life.
It's Maria.
She did this.
Maria gave me a reason to live
once you left.
The flowers defined me.
Your mother and Maria took you away.
I've tried for years to find you.
I didn't leave you.
I want to talk to you about your homosexuality.
[SIGHS]
I'm not a homosexual.
Maria said you would deny it.
Well, she's a liar.
She's lying to you.
I had the same struggle
when I first fell in love with Maria
and we began to have dirty, aching sex.
Maria is your lover?
Of course, she introduced me to myself.
To my vagina and to hers.
But you have no idea
how evil she is.
I need to forgive you before I die
but I can't forgive someone
who has not asked for forgiveness.
I just want-- I have no time.
I need you to ask for forgiveness.
Can you ever forgive me?
For what?
For abandoning you.
For abandoning you to have anal sex
with my homosexual lover, Eric.
[CRYING]
I will, I'll say it.
For abandoning you...
to have anal sex
with my homosexual lover, Eric.
No.
[CRYING]: Oh.
[CRYING]
[SNIFFLES]
No, I'm sorry.
I cannot.
[GROANS]
I hope you are happy, faggot.
I'm not happy.
I've talked to you before.
This is not a play about dating.
It's about death.
Make it personal. - Move along.
He doesn't need to yell at them.
[CLEARS THROAT]
It is a play about dating.
It's not a play just about death.
It's about everything.
Dating, birth, death, life, family...
...all that.
This doesn't look real.
What?
It's not real. I can't hear you.
[TRAFFIC NOISE]
Morning, Hazel.
Hi, Caden.
How was your night?
It was okay. Yours?
Ugh, Phillip was colicky.
I was up all night.
SAMMY: Oh, sorry.
Sorry.
Everybody here?
Sammy's not here.
Jimmy called and-- [CLEARS THROAT]
Said there's some subway problem.
Sorry. Sorry.
Hi, Hazel.
Hi, Sammy.
Sammy likes you.
I need you to build this.
This is just the façade.
It's Adele's place.
We'll be casting an Ellen.
I can give you the interiors later.
A few days?
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Millicent Weems?
Caden, this is--
Hazel, what do you think of this title?
Unknown, Unkissed and Lost?
Meh...
Anyway, uh, this is Millicent Weems.
CADEN: Have a seat.
How are you at cleaning?
Very, very good at it.
Because this part requires a lot of it.
You'd be playing a cleaning lady.
I played Egga,
the cleaning lady, in Hedda Gabler
at the Roundabout.
Great. Okay.
And, uh, Mrs. Dobson
in Scrub-A-Dub at the Pantages.
You're weirdly close to what I visualized
for this character.
Glad to be weirdly close.
MAURICE: Sorry, everybody.
Maurice, what's going on?
I'm sorry.
We have a couple of new guys on.
We're not in sync yet.
We good to go?
Yes, sir.
[COUGHS]
I'm sorry.
Are you Ellen?
Are you Ellen Bascomb?
Shit.
Line, please?
"What?"
Right, right.
What?
I'm to give the key to 31Y
to Ellen Bascomb.
Yes, I'm Ellen.
Oh, dear. It's the wrong key.
ADELE: I'll be in, in a second.
Did you hear that? - What?
Uh, Caden, you're breaking the fourth wall.
This is the wrong key.
I can open-- - I'm supposed to open the door.
Hold on.
Are you in there?
There's no one in there.
Adele? - Caden.
ADELE: I'm jumping in the shower.
I'll be out in a second.
If you want some coffee
I can make a fresh pot.
Did you look at the new painting on my easel?
What do you think?
Hey, thanks for the fuck this morning.
People don't walk like that.
What? Too...?
No, just walk like yourself.
Watch. Watch this.
I gotta go.
Watch this.
Where's, uh, Hazel and Sammy?
Sammy.
[BOTH LAUGHING] Sammy.
Hi, Caden.
What are you doing?
I was being you, I...
You know, you like Hazel, I like Hazel.
This Hazel doesn't exist for you.
If you wanna like a Hazel, like that one.
That's what I tried to tell him.
No harm, no foul, Caden.
It's equity break anyway.
Ten minutes, everybody!
Hazel. - What?
Well, you don't like him, do you?
HAZEL: Yeah, he reminds me of you.
[LAUGHS]
I'm me.
You don't need someone to remind you of me.
Oh, don't worry, Caden.
I like you more.
I do.
It's just, Sammy's fun.
[LAUGHS] [PHONE RINGS]
I'm fun.
Oh, sweetie, no, you're not.
Hold on a sec. Yes?
MAN: Is this Caden Cotard?
Yes.
This is Officer Melnin of Schenectady P.D.
I'm sorry to inform you
your mother's been the victim of a home invasion.
What does that mean?
She is dead.
Was my father standing with us?
I don't know what he looks like.
He's dead.
So he looks dead, I guess.
Probably wasn't him, then.
He was a big guy.
Anyway...
Thanks for coming with me.
That's okay.
I asked Hazel
but she was busy tonight,
and you're the next best thing.
I mean, it's not that you're the next best thing
but because you play her, it feels comforting.
Does that make sense?
[LAUGHS]
Although the thing is,
off-stage you're nothing like her.
But you play her very well, though.
Did Hazel mention what she was doing tonight?
Because I called her house before we left
and her husband told me
she wasn't gonna be back till late.
And I just thought that was weird
because she said Phillip was sick.
She's having dinner with Sammy.
That's interesting.
He's supposed to like me.
I'll have another talk with him.
Will you excuse me?
I need to go to the bathroom.
Don't forget your phone.
Hmm.
Thanks, Yammy.
[RINGS]
HAZEL:It's Hazel. Leave a message or not.
It's your dime.
You can stay in my parents' room.
[DIAL TONE BEEPING]
[GASPS]
CADEN: I thought someone would have cleaned it up.
TAMMY: Who?
I don't know. Someone.
This is my room. You can sleep here.
Where are you going to sleep?
[SIGHS] The living-room couch.
Don't you want to sleep with me?
It's just sex.
Okay.
If you think it's okay.
How can you be like that?
TAMMY: I get undressed every day.
In front of someone is different.
I don't see why.
Maybe because you have a beautiful body.
Maybe that makes it easier.
TAMMY: Yeah, I suppose it might.
Do you want to fuck?
I do. Um, do you?
Take your clothes off.
I'm sorry.
I'm very, very lonely.
I don't, ah...
know what's wrong. I-I just--
[SNIFFLES]
I'm sorry.
Do you understand?
I mean, can--? Can you understand loneliness?
Yeah. I mean--
I don't know, I--
I feel okay, mostly.
Fucking might help.
[SOBS]
I'm sorry.
It's okay, I don't mind.
Take your clothes off.
You're very pretty.
Thanks.
Sometimes I wish I could be pretty like that.
What, you wish you were a girl?
Sometimes I think I might have been better at it.
Interesting.
It's kind of a drag in a lot of ways.
Do you like guys?
No.
I only love women.
Well, I'm getting cold.
[#]
You're pretty, Caden.
[SIGHS]
Thanks for saying that.
Come to bed, pretty Caden.
I shouldn't have drunk so much fucking beer last night.
ACTOR: What are you gonna do about it?
ACTRESS: Get lunch. What are you going to do?
ACTOR: For chrissake. - Good, Roland.
ACTOR: Thanks, Caden.
We need to fire him.
We don't need to fire him.
Jeremy's playing to us.
Tell him to talk to Donna and we'll hear what we hear.
Sammy's explaining too much. It feels expository.
It needs to be shorthand, like, "Jeremy, big."
Caden, can we stop a second?
Sure.
If Hazel's in love with Sammy,
and Caden's in love with Hazel
there would be a big confrontation
where Caden turns to me and says:
"It's obvious he's a substitute for me."
Then I think Hazel would have a good moment where she cries
or gets ang-- Gets angry,
I'm not sure which, but I think it's sound--
HAZEL: That didn't happen.
I think Hazel would do that.
But Hazel hasn't done that, Tammy.
Caden, what do you think?
I-- I feel like we could-- We could try it.
Great. - Fuck.
Let's try it.
[COUGHS] Maybe it could happen at the director's table.
[CLEARS THROAT] Fuck.
You know, Tammy's right.
I don't understand why you're with Sammy.
He's nice, he's available, he fucks me without crying.
Since when are you available?
Derek left because of you.
When?
How come you never told me?
I don't know, Caden. - How come a lot of things, huh?
Fuck.
I gotta let go of the actor who played Derek.
What's his name?
What? That is such a romantic response.
I am touched. - It's not my response.
Derek is played by... It crossed my mind.
We have enormous budgetary concerns here.
Oh, oh...
Joe.
Stop. Okay? No, just stop.
I do not like Tammy, and she's nothing like me.
How can you like her, anyway?
She looks like you.
Joe Abernathy. No, she does not.
She offered to have sex with me.
Ugh. - Abernathy?
Yeah.
Was it good?
It was nice. - Oh.
I'm just being honest.
It was nice. It wasn't earth-shattering.
Did you cry? - No.
[SCOFFS] You're making progress.
Okay, I cried a little before.
Hazel, you've been a part of me forever.
Don't you know that?
I breathe your name in every exhalation.
What are we doing?
I don't know.
[#]
HAZEL: Oh,
this is the place - Yeah.
I stayed with Derek and the kids.
Yeah, we're almost--
Caden.
Oh.
Caden.
Caden. Caden, look at me.
CADEN: What are you doing?
Sammy, stay right where you are. I'm coming up.
There's nothing to talk about, Hazel. It's not your fault.
What are you doing?
I've watched you forever, Caden.
But you've never really looked at anyone other than yourself.
So watch me.
[SNIFFLES]
Watch my heart break.
Watch me jump.
[LAUGHS]
Watch me learn that after death there's nothing.
No more watching, there's no more following, no love.
Say goodbye to Hazel for me.
And say it for yourself too.
None of us has much time.
Sammy! Come down!
SAMMY: Hazel, I love you!
CADEN: Sammy!
I didn't jump, Sammy.
A man stopped me before I jumped. Get up!
I didn't jump.
I know how to do it now.
There are nearly 13 million people in the world.
I mean, can you imagine that many people?
And none of those people is an extra.
They're all leads in their own stories.
They have to be given their due.
I know how to do it now.
There are 13 million people in this world.
Can you imagine how many people that is?
None of those people are an extra.
They're all a lead in their own story.
They have got to be given their due.
Do you see what I'm saying?
Come over tonight.
Please.
You know, we could get a place together.
We could get a loft.
HAZEL: God, Caden, that sounds nice.
I miss my daughter.
Maybe she could come live with us.
I miss Olive.
And the other one.
I'm a bad person.
Oh, no, you're not.
I am.
I should never have gone out with Sammy.
I was just trying to get to you.
You can't cause someone to kill himself.
He was very troubled.
God, Caden.
I wish we had this when we were young.
[SIGHS]
And all those years in between.
My heart aches so much for you.
We're here, Caden.
I'm here.
I'm aching for it being over.
Yeah,
the end is built into the beginning.
What can you do?
God, you're just perfect.
I'm a mess.
[CHUCKLES]
But we fit,
don't we?
Yeah.
CADEN: It doesn't always happen for me now
because of the medication and everything.
I take a lot of pills.
It's okay.
I'm-- I'm embarrassed.
I don't want you to think it's about you or-- Or me.
It's okay.
[SIGHS]
[#]
I have a title.
The Obscure Moon Lighting an Obscure World.
I think it might be too much.
Yeah, probably.
[CHUCKLES]
MAN: Sir, could you come up here, please?
Oh.
[#]
Might be smoke inhalation.
[SOBS]
[#]
HAZEL: It's Hazel. Leave a message or not. It's your dime.
[BEEPS]
I know how to do the play now.
It'll all take place over the course of one day
and that day will be the day before you died.
It was the happiest day of my life.
And I'll be able to relive it forever.
See you soon.
MICHAEL: So have you got any thoughts
for today's rehearsal?
I have a new title, maybe.
Oh.
Infectious Diseases in Cattle.
Oh.
The title means a lot of things.
You'll see, it means a lot.
I need a Caden for my Hazel.
I'd very much like to play Caden.
I-I know that--
I know that it would be nontraditional casting
but I think, ah, I could do it.
I think I understand him.
I don't understand him.
Well, Caden Cotard is a man already dead.
He, um, lives in a half world between stasis and antistasis
and time is concentrated,
chronology confused.
Yet up until recently he's--
He's strived valiantly
to make sense of his situation.
But now he, ah-- He's turned to stone.
Okay. Sounds good.
Okay.
Thanks.
She's right?
I didn't see that at all.
I saw it as much more hopeful.
None of those people is extras.
They're all leads in their own stories.
No, this is tedious. - This is nothing.
MILLICENT: Your scene's over. Would you leave the stage?
What is she doing?
He's directing.
MILLICENT [WHISPERING]: Can I get you down at the coffin there?
MICHAEL: She not getting the feel of you, Caden.
You don't move around like that. You don't talk to people.
Sit on the ground there.
Okay, everybody, let's run it.
ACTOR: Everything is more complicated than you think.
You only see a tenth of what is true.
There are a million little strings
attached to every choice you make.
You can destroy your life every time you choose.
But maybe you won't know for 20 years
and you may never, ever trace it to its source.
And you only get one chance to play it out.
Just try and figure out your own divorce.
And they say there is no fate,
but there is,
it's what you create.
And even though the world goes on for eons and eons
you are only here for a fraction of a fraction of a second.
Most of your time is spent being dead or not yet born.
But while alive, you wait in vain
wasting years
for a phone call or a letter or a look
from someone or something to make it all right.
And it never comes,
or it seems to, but it doesn't really.
So you spend your time in vague regret
or vaguer hope that something good will come along.
Something to make you feel connected.
Something to make you feel whole.
Something to make you feel loved.
And the truth is
I feel so angry.
And the truth is
I feel so fucking sad.
And the truth is, I've felt so fucking hurt
for so fucking long.
And for just as long, I've been pretending I'm okay
just to get along,
just for--
I don't know why.
Maybe because no one wants to hear about my misery
because they have their own.
Well, fuck everybody.
Amen.
[#]
Delightful.
Thanks.
I'm out of ideas.
I'm dead.
Well, I could take over as you for a bit
until you feel refreshed.
I think you're tired, Caden.
All these years of creative work.
I think you just need some time
to regroup.
I need to keep my hand in.
Well, Ellen needs to be filled.
What do you mean?
Her role. Just for a bit.
It's a choice role.
I do like to clean.
[#]
Ellen?
Yes?
Caden asked me to give you this.
You're to keep it in all the time.
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: So touched by the sadness
of Adele's neighbor so close to death.
Say, "Thank you," to Adele's neighbor.
Thank you.
You're very welcome, young lady.
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Now say, "Have a very good day."
Have a very good day.
I will indeed.
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Reach for the toilet paper.
Wrap some around your hand.
Wipe yourself.
There was supposed to be something else.
You were supposed to have something,
a calm.
Love.
Children.
A child, at least.
Children.
Meaning.
Everything okay, Eric?
Everything is everything.
ELLEN: He hates me.
I disappointed him, and he hates me.
Everyone is disappointing when you know someone.
ELLEN: I remember having that picnic with my mother.
Look at me.
Ellen, what is it?
I was so young.
I'm going to remember this moment
for the rest of my life, Mama,
and in exactly 20 years, come here with my daughter
and have exactly the same picnic.
ELLEN: There was so much hope.
Baby, that the loveliest thing I've ever heard.
ELLEN: Oh, God.
Sorry, Mommy. I'm sorry.
[SOBS]
ELLEN: Where is my little girl?
Where is my little girl?
[BEEPS]
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Look at the night table for a note from Adele.
MAN: Adele died of lung cancer last night.
You may stay on if you like.
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Stare out the window.
Remember the time she got you to pose
for one of her paintings?
How she told you how beautiful you were?
How she made you feel pretty again for a little while?
Think how you'll miss her.
Stand up.
[#]
Now it is waiting, and nobody cares.
And when your wait is over, this room will still exist...
[PEOPLE CHANTING]
...and it will continue to hold shoes and dresses and boxes
and maybe someday another waiting person.
And maybe not.
PEOPLE: Freedom. Two, four!
The room doesn't care either.
[INDISTINCT YELLING]
[YELLING STOPS]
[CRASH]
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Hello?
[CRIES OUT]
There's nobody running the elevator anymore.
[#]
[MAN SCREAMS]
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: What was once before you,
an exciting and mysterious future
is now behind you,
lived, understood, disappointing.
You realize you are not special.
You have struggled into existence
and are now slipping silently out of it.
This is everyone's experience.
Every single one.
The specifics hardly matter.
Everyone is everyone.
So you are Adele,
Hazel, Claire,
Olive.
You are Ellen.
All her meager sadnesses are yours.
All her loneliness.
The gray, straw-like hair.
Her red, raw hands. It's yours.
It is time for you to understand this.
[RADIO CRACKLES]
[#]
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Walk.
As the people who adore you stop adoring you
as they die, as they move on
as you shed them, as you shed
your beauty, your youth
as the world forgets you,
as you recognize your transience,
as you begin to lose
your characteristics one by one
as you learn there is no one watching you
and there never was,
you think only about driving.
Not coming from anyplace,
not arriving anyplace,
just driving,
counting off time.
Now, you are here.
It's 7:43.
Now, you are here. It's 7:44.
Now, you are...
gone.
CADEN: Where is everybody?
Mostly dead.
Some have left.
Would you sit with me for a moment?
Because I'm very tired and-- And lonely.
[EXHALES] Hmm.
I feel like I know you.
Well, I was, um, the mother in Ellen's dream.
Yes.
You seem a bit older than I remember.
That dream was quite a while ago.
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Apologize.
I didn't mean to say you looked old.
Ah--
[#]
CADEN: There's everyone's dreams in all those apartments.
[SIGHS]
All those thoughts
I'll never know.
That's the truth of it.
I wanted to do that picnic with my daughter.
I feel like I've disappointed you terribly.
Oh, no.
I am so proud of you.
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Ask her if you can put your head on her shoulder.
Can I lay my head on your shoulder?
Yes.
[SIGHS] Hmm.
I love you.
I love you too.
[SOBS]
[#]
I know how to do this play now.
I have an idea.
I think...
if everyone--
MILLICENT [OVER RADIO]: Die.
# I'm just a little person #
# One person in a sea #
# Of many little people #
# Who are not aware of me #
# I do my little job #
# And live my little life #
# Eat my little meals #
# Miss my little kid and wife #
# And somewhere Maybe someday #
# Maybe somewhere far away #
# I'll find A second little person #
# Who will look at me and say #
# I know you #
# You're the one I've waited for #
# Let's have some fun #
# Life is precious #
# Every minute #
# And more precious With you in it #
# So let's have some fun #
# I'm glad I found you #
# Like hanging round you #
# You're the one #
# I like the best #
# Somewhere, maybe someday #
# Maybe somewhere far away #
# Somewhere, maybe someday #
# Maybe somewhere far away #
# Somewhere, maybe someday #
# Maybe somewhere far away #
# I'll meet A second little person #
# And we'll go out and play #